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I can't help it though. I just can't get death and depressing stuff off my mind.
It's not as bad now, but it still randomly hits me. I think I'm just scared to have someone else be taking away--but this time closer. Sigh.
In other news, this morning on the way to school a farmer was moving his cows across the street and I found this extremely hilarious--and I'm not exactly sure why. I just kept thinking, "Wow, I really do live out in the country."
Argh, it's 1:30AM and I just don't want to go to bed. The pull of exhaustion is there--but I don't want to give in. I'd rather sit here and strain my eyes that much more ;]
School is being a bitter whore. I have gobs of homework to finish up this weekend. Looks like that's what I'll be doing all day tomorrow and Sunday. Gee golly, and I wait so anxiously for the weekend.
Tonight at work I decided I clearly do not want kids for at least 4 years. There's a group of adults who come in with their insanely annoying kids at least once a week. The parents to do NOT once so ever discipline their kids. They refer to one of the waitresses as "the mean lady" because she told the woman to get her baby off the floor because he was directly in our way and there was a high chance of hot pizza landing square on him. They don't like us, we don't like them. But STILL they come in. I don't think I have detested kids as much as I detest those little animals.
Since you're here...( One day I hope to look back at it all and think, )
- Mood:
blank - Music:How High... that movie is awesome!
School: I made a 92/92 on my accounting test. Hell yes! However, I'm not so sure I did so great on my math test. I really hate math. But after this semester I get the sneaky feeling I'll at least have a good working relationship with it. Between accouting and math I feel like my whole life is about numbers. Well, my school life anyway. My other three classes are going pretty good too. I mean, two of them are computer classes and one of them is a crap class about drugs and society. Which turned out to be a class about how my teacher used to be a drug head *shrugs* it's easy.
Life: Life is pretty good. I have to get my wisdom teeth pulled probably next month. And I'm probably getting braces this summer. Which means I'll probably have braces next year for my 21st birthday. But oh well, I'll have a beautiful smile :]
Me and my parents have been getting along as well as expected. I mean, we argue but it isn't nearly as bad as it used to be. Me and my real dad though. I don't know what's up with that. I called him a few weeks ago to ask him if I could get on his insurance so that I can get braces and my wisdom teeth pulled. Ever since then he's been acting funny. When he talks to me he talks to me for only a couple of minutes then hangs up with me. It's like I've asked too much of him. Hello. You're my dad. That means you're supposed to do things for me. Regardless of if it takes up time out of your oh so "busy" schedule.
Love: After that last journal entry, I really have been being a better person. I haven't been as snappy and what not. I think it might have just been all bottled up. And uh yeh I was getting pretty irratated with the fact that we hadn't done anything in three weeks because he's been fishing. I had been wanting to go do SOMETHING, anything..other than staying home, but he didn't want because he was too tired or going to be tired for fishing. But last night we went do something, and it was so nice. We got back to his house and I definitely fell asleep in his arms in the recliner. After we discussed what size ring I wear and how badly I want a ring. Even though I know he's not going to buy me one, it's fun to think about when he does. I can't wait to have just a ring, not an engagement ring or anything, on my finger and be like, "Yeh, Jeremy got me this because he loves me *BIG SMILE*" I'm a cheeseball.
Argh. I really have to clean my room and work on some homework.
I don't really feel like it.
I really need to get batteries for my camera.
I just worked out and my legs feel all weak because I never work out..and my abs are going to be sore...and I'm SO going to love it.
I want a supremely hot body for the summer.
ANDOOOOH. I found a bikini at VICTORIA SECRET, for FOURTEEN DOLLARS!! Can we say mine?
Yes, we can :]
- Mood:
cheerful
