Ah, it feels good to be LJ'ing pretty regularly now.
Can someone tell me why people from my past always pop up at unexpected moments and expect me to forget everything they ever did.. and like them and talk to them? I don't understand this little phenomenon that happens upon me quite often. A few weeks ago an ex best friend tried talking to me after she did some very disgraceful things when our ex boyfriend died. Yes, I said our because while we were best friends she started dating him two days after he broke up with me. But you know what? That's not what bothered me. What bothered me was when he died she told me in a very, very ugly way. I swore never to speak to her again.. and I basically told her that.
A few weeks ago she tells me on Myspace that she's moving to Baton Rouge (with is about two hours from where I live) and that we should go party. I didn't even answer her back. Why bother? An ex-boyfriend this morning started telling me about his family problems. Hey, guess what guys? I'm not the Robyn from three years ago who forgives and forgets. I'm sorry, I can't do that anymore.
Sometimes I feel like a failure as a friend. One of my friends is having a pretty rough time.. but I can't find the words or means to console her anymore. I see the solution in my mind, clear as day--but you can't make someone do what they themselves don't feel is right. It's hard seeing someone like that, so amazing, so strong.. crumpling under all the pressures of life.. and realizing there's absolutely nothing you can do...
On the subject of friends. There's a girl I've been friends with since seriously 7th grade. Through high school we lost touch, but our senior year we started getting close again. Well, she met a guy. This guy is in no way shape or form the "perfect" guy. He screwed her over.. they broke up. She swore not to be with him again. Few months passed, she was with him again.. a few more months and they were engaged. And I stopped seeing her because he's the type of guy that keeps a girl from seeing her friends. Well, they're married now, and she isn't the person I used to know. She was always loud, outgoing and so friendly. Now she almost seems.. passive. She doesn't say much, she's just kinda like.. eh whatever.
How do people change THAT drastically for the worst?
And then, you know, there's always the friend that acts like they have your best interest at heart, but in reality they are just so jealous of you it's sickening. Hah.
I wanna make love in this club
Sadly enough, I think I'm obsessed with that song.
New Orleans bound in just 4 days!
I can't wait!!
- Location:computer desk
- Mood:
cheerful - Music:Make Love in This Club Usher
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chasethestars
chasethestars
Comments
Isn't it great when those people pop up? My ex tried that for half a year.. and might still try it.. even though he knows i pretty violently hate him. Another friend persisted for a Year when i hadn't spoken to her and one day i accidentally replied to a new screenname of hers and we started talking like we hadn't missed a beat.
I've come to the conclusion that people are strange. They can do horrific things to other people and later, if they realize they miss said person/said person was good, they auto-think they'll be forgiven. :shakes head:. It's possible with some.
I'm sure you have a certain set guidelines to what you'll take and what you won't or what you'll forgive and how many times you'll forgive. If you ever talk to these people you might just need to tell them where your guidelines are set.
Don't feel like a failure there. Sometimes it is hard if you know a person is less likely to listen. It's completely understandable. Maybe just pose it to them like "This could solve your dilemma.. but me saying it is different from you choosing to do it and that decision is all yours". Perhaps suggest to help if they choose to follow your advice.
it's pretty stupid.
As for being a bad friend, if you know that your friend isn't going to listen anyway then what's the point? Sometimes there's nothing to say but at least you can be there to listen. Often being a listener is far more helpful to someone in trouble.
It just happens...